I was in my car on the way to an International Women’s Day event a couple of weeks ago, when the thought came to my mind “I should have made a bit more effort with my appearance, there are going to be a lot of people there tonight, I probably should have worn false eyelashes, I should have tied my hair up so I look more put together.”
When I saw the pictures and videos post-event those thoughts were reconfirmed, but then all of a sudden I had another thought. “I was attending the event as a panellist, people were coming to hear what I had to say, I should be more concerned about wanting the ladies being interested in what I had to say, rather than how I look like.”
For as long as I can remember I had issues with certain features on my face. I could blame the media for the beauty standards it promotes or those who told me to do plastic surgery but I won’t.
Over the last few years I decided to feel good about who I am from the inside, the way we feel about our looks is usually an indicator of the way we think about ourselves.
Now, I ‘get it’ we are all beautiful in our own way. I’m kind of over caring too much about the way I look these days, like really, there are way more important things in the world than the way we look. I feel like I wasted time associating my self-worth on my physical appearance. I know, we shouldn’t have regrets, but it would have been nice to come across more positive and realistic examples of women while growing up. Maybe then myself and many other young people wouldn’t have wasted time giving their appearance more time than it deserves.
If I ever become a mother to a little girl or boy, I’ll make sure they understand how valuable they are, irrespective of their outer beauty and physicality.
Compliments on looks are always appreciated and are graciously accepted, but it’s only when you notice the beauty of someone’s spirit that’s when you really see them.
As a human being, you are so much more than the way you look. You have so much depth, wisdom and energy to give the world, despite the way you look. Maybe society looks at the outward appearance, but God and the people who love you truly see you and understand your heart.
Shefa Ali
