These principles have helped me steady my nerves and guide me through chaos, I use them in times of fear and uncertainty and hope they can help you navigate life’s inevitable rocky patches too.
Don’t be afraid of your thoughts — we all have trains of thoughts, but if we board a scary one, we will travel to a frightening place in the past or the future. It’s usually my thoughts about my thoughts that get me into trouble. Feeling frightened simply means I am having some not very nice thoughts, the more I see that I am creating my own experience the faster I begin to unwind from the drama and come back to reality. From that calmer place I usually know the right thing to do.
Worrying won’t make the problem go away — when our minds are full of worry, we have no space to see the situation clearly. We may think we want to stop but subconsciously we have learnt to see worry as beneficial. When we understand what worry is (anxious thinking rather than important information about our future) we can find the courage to leave it alone. With a clearer mind we can find solutions to the challenges we are facing.
We all what to feel in control, somehow it makes us feel safer. No one knows what’s going to happen, we just live in the illusion that we think we do. We like what’s familiar, but we learn from what’s new. Adversity creates new perspectives, different priorities a deeper appreciation of life and most importantly a trust in ourselves that we can handle this disordered uncertain world. We have all had experiences when we have had to rise to the occasion, and these times allow us to see how strong we are and even in the worst circumstances we have the capacity to find something good.
* The author is a consultant and coach. Instagram handle: @miss_shefa, Website: missshefa.com